Recently, I received one of the greatest compliments in my line of work. A touring artist, who hits around three countries in one weekend during Summer, looked at me and said, "Thank you for everything. I feel safe around you." This simple statement meant the world to me because it encapsulates something often overlooked in the high-energy, fast-paced world of music and entertainment: the need for safety.
As a coach and counselor working with top-level artists, I often get asked whether I'm "working" when I'm at festivals or events. The truth is, when I'm engaging in a genuine conversation with someone I usually work with in sessions, it doesn't feel like work at all. My role isn't about managing their schedule or making sure everything goes smoothly - that's for their tour managers or agents. Instead, my focus is on creating (or better yet: being) a safe space for them, even in the middle of the chaos.
We shouldn't underestimate the importance of safety. For many people, including myself, safety wasn't always a given. Our nervous systems can be on high alert, especially for touring artists who are constantly on the go and in the public eye. When you're an artist, everyone wants a piece of you - whether it's for a chat, a photo, or just to be in your presence. But amidst all this, it's crucial that they have a place where they can feel grounded, where they can be themselves without the pressure to perform or entertain.
It's important to understand that safety isn't something you 'do'. While actions (like being reliable, keeping promises, and being a solid support system make a difference), true safety comes from who you 'are'. It's about your 'being', not just your doing. Creating a safe space for someone means embodying a sense of calm, trust, and presence that others can feel and rely on. It's about being a foundation they can depend on, not just because you say the right things or take the right actions, but because of the energy and authenticity you bring to every interaction.
However, this "being" isn't something that can be forced or manufactured. It's not entirely within our control to decide who we are at our core. If you try to 'be' that safe presence intentionally, it can come off as inauthentic, and people, especially artists, are incredibly sensitive to that. They have a finely tuned filter for detecting who genuinely has their best interests at heart and who doesn't. The essence of creating a safe atmosphere goes beyond conscious effort - it's something unexplainable, something that emanates naturally from the core of your being. It’s not just about actions, but about the spiritual essence of who you are.
For artists who are hitting multiple countries in a weekend, the need for such a space becomes even more critical. Their nervous systems are often in overdrive, constantly assessing and responding to the demands of their environment. This makes the feeling of safety not just a luxury, but a necessity. It's about having a haven where they can relax, let go, and be vulnerable without fear of judgment or expectation.
Safety, in this context, isn't just physical. It's emotional, psychological, and even spiritual. It's about being in a space where you're not just seen as a performer, but as a person. And when an artist tells me they feel safe around me, it means that I'm succeeding in my mission to provide that essential support.
Creating this environment isn't always easy, especially in the midst of a bustling festival where the primary focus is fun and entertainment. But for those I work with, it's a crucial part of their well-being. And that's what truly matters to me.
So, the next time someone asks if I'm "working" at an event, I'll know that the answer goes far beyond a simple yes or no. It's about being there for the artists and professionals who need that space of safety, even in the most unexpected places. In my work, it's not just about what I can "do" for them, it's about what I "be" for them first and foremost.
How do you define the spaces where you truly feel safe, and who are the people that create them for you?